That’s how old my oldest daughter is. It is also how long it has been since hubby and I went on a vacation (long or short) without kids… something I may not have written on my about me page. Crazy… I know!
To be completely honest, I take full responsibility. My husband has tried to convince me to go away even for just one night… but I couldn’t. Since my daughters were born, I have been with them 24/7 never leaving their side for more than a few hours. The thought of leaving them was something that I could not wrap my head around.
Why you ask?
Because of fear. The fear that something will happen to the girls (or myself). Also, the fear of missing out. I did not want to miss any of milestones or exciting moments.
Because of my need to be in control. I want to know exactly what my girls are doing and when. I also want it to be done my way (because there is no other way to do things… right?).
Because of guilt. I felt that it was wrong to leave the girls and to go on vacation and have fun with out them. I also felt guilty to spend money on having fun when we could use it towards something more practical… like groceries or paying bills.
Because of trust issues. This is probably the biggest reason why I couldn’t go away. My life experiences have caused me to have a very hard time trusting anybody… and I mean anybody.
So… It has been 7 years.
I don’t regret that it has taken so long… I needed to do it when I was ready. But, I am sure happy that I finally put on my big girl panties and decided to go away with hubby. It wasn’t easy but hubby challenged me and I am always up for a challenge. He said if I found the babysitter (aka ask my parents because they are the only ones I trust) he would book the place (aka I would book it because he is always working). Realizing that it has been 7 years and seeing how much he wanted to go away, how could I say no?
Feeling ready to go away, I started planning immediately. I picked a date, confirmed that my parents could stay the weekend at my house to watch the girls and looked for a place. It really didn’t matter where it was (as long as it wasn’t too far away from home) or what activities there were to do… we really just wanted to get away. We wanted to enjoy each other without any interruptions. After asking around and searching online, we finally decided to go to the Madison Beach Hotel in Madison, CT.
While our getaway was short (we only went from Friday night to Sunday afternoon), I will say the Madison Beach Hotel was the perfect choice for us. It was just 45 minutes from our house, on the beach (I never knew how relaxing it was to fall asleep to the sound of the waves hitting the shore) and it provided the perfect intimate and luxurious getaway we needed. The room had a fireplace, a king sized bed, a soaking tub and a separate standing shower with the rainfall shower head.
For food, we ate at the hotel’s Wharf Restaurant and ordered room service… I mean how can you pass up breakfast in bed?
We took a trip to the Clinton Crossing Premium Outlets for some walking and shopping. With Mohegan Sun Casino only 30 minutes away, we went to eat and celebrate our birthdays at the Michael Jordan’s Steakhouse… which was absolutely delicious and has the best Garlic Bread I have ever eaten).
After 7 years…
Our little getaway taught me a lot. The most important lesson I learned was how important the little things are and how easy it is to forget them. Let me share with you the 10 little things that you can do with NO INTERRUPTIONS during a weekend getaway (without kids) with your partner a necessity!
With No Interruptions…
You can sleep. Can I tell you how good it felt to nap when I wanted to and wake up when I wanted too.
You can use the bathroom. Do I need to say more?
You can shower. No one that had to go potty while I was in the shower and there was no arguing or getting hurt (because yes it happens all the time).
You can have a conversation. I could give my full attention to what hubby was saying and actually listen without having one ear on the girls.
You can eat hot food. It never fails… every time we go out to dinner, one or both girls have to go potty as soon as our entrees are placed on the table. Between that and having to cut their food, my food is always luke warm or cold which I have come to accept.
You can have an adult drink. There is no need to worry about keeping an eye on the kids.
You can watch adult movies. By adult movies, i’m talking movies with curses and adult content… not the other kind of “adult movies” although there is nothing wrong with that (no judgement here).
You can listen to adult music. Music with adult language and content is something I rarely have a chance to listen to anymore.
You can do what you want when you want. We napped, showered, watched TV, ate and went out without having to worry about nap time or possible break downs.
You can enjoy each other. Laugh. Play. Cuddle. Talk. Whatever you want!
Besides the little things…
I realized how important it is to getaway without kids for the health of our relationship. I was able to remember who I am as an individual and as a partner with my husband. We talked and laughed and took the time to really reconnect with each other remembering why we are together.
Of course, the weekend went by in the blink of an eye. However, it was absolutely AMAZING and EXACTLY what we needed! We came back relaxed and rejuvenated. The best part is… I survived, my daughters survived and my parents enjoyed quality time with their granddaughters (and they realized I do not make up any of the stories I tell them about the girls… lol). It went so well that I am actually already thinking of our next getaway. Tell me… where do you think we should go next?
My name is Michelle and I am the wife of the hardest working man I know, the Mami of 4 beautiful and AMAZING kids (3 girls and 1 boy) and a Pathologists’ Assistant turned Stay at Home Mami turned Owner and Creative Director of Mami Works Design Studio, LLC. I am super excited to share my experiences and learn from you. As women/moms/entrepreneurs, we must stick together and support each other!